social media? take a break from it --I dare you!

Recently I quit Facebook quite abruptly, and most definitely temporarily.
I will admit to popping in, very briefly, and "liking" or commenting on one or two posts of certain (very) select friends.
I have sent private messages to 3 or 4 people as well.... mainly because I refuse to cut myself off from everyone.

There truly was no one, single thing that made me shut it down..... it was a combination of comments, and of shared posts,.... and a little bit of hatefulness that certain people/groups shared.  (so if you think you can personally take "credit" for banishing me -- frell you- you're wrong)

Along with those reasons I will make an admission here.... certain food related posts really piss me off.  Pardon my "French" but in all honesty.... I wish that people would not "share so I can find it later".... and then share all manner of disgusting or unhealthy recipes that include photos of the crap that some people are willing to shovel into their pie hole. 

Did that come off as a little hateful? Well here is another newsflash: I am sick and tired of stifling who I am simply to keep in the good graces of a bunch of snowflakes (read pussies).... yes- I am getting a little graphic, and I do realize that I will put some of you off..... 

I fall into on of my own categories of people.... the overall term I use is "generational".... if I say that I am releasing my "inner Archie Bunker" would that make things clearer?  No, I am not a bigot, and NO I am NOT prejudiced,...unless you fit into your own little stereotype.... I mean, if you fit into a stereotype, then my inner Archie Bunker cannot stifle itself INSIDE MY HEAD.  I do not make a habit of insulting people intentionally. 

Now, getting back to the disgusting and unhealthy,.... first of all I have celiac disease, and seeing a shitton of gluten laden "easy to make" meals featuring, for example, crescent rolls MAKES. ME. SICK. it truly does,... and then there are pictures of desserts... let's not even go down that path.  

Add to that the foods that I am allergic to.... strawberries (gag) and a friend posted a recipe and photo of the most disgusting looking pink cake,... even a friend who like strawberries and can eat cake (read gluten) said she was disgusted by it.... but it was shared by a guy,... I mean really, a guy,... so I forgave him.

Other food allergies include: shellfish, citrus fruit (lemon, lime, orange, grapefruit).... I do not and will not eat: asparagus, fish of any kind,.... I could go on.... And I really, truly do not want to see sugar-laden desserts any longer.... I have given up sugar, and now abstain from soda pop, and desserts --for the most part,.... and honestly, that Hershey bar tastes kind of gross after cutting 95% of all sugar from my diet for over 8 weeks.

I just wish that more people would think about what they share on Facebook.... Why don't I "unfollow" but remain "friends" with the offenders?  Well, I was hesitating to do that, but that will be my future on Facebook.... but it does narrow the field. rather. much.  

Another admission....  I will, unashamedly, admit that I am now addicted to Twitter.  There is a much greater level of anonymity there, and sometimes a lot more smut.  But far fewer pictures of food, thank the twitterverse for that.

I have already blocked a certain segment of "friends" (read blood relatives) from Facebook, even though I am not actively posting or even logging in to Facebook at present.  Honestly, if I want to communicate with certain friends I do log in to FB so that I can access Messenger with my laptop --it is so much easier to write articulate  responses when I have a full keyboard to type on.

As I write this I am making a list in my head of who to "unfollow".... that means the majority of their posts will not appear in my newsfeed, but I will still be friends with the people.  I have at least one friend who objects to "unfollow", stating that you are either friends or you are not, but I need to get away from that Facebook obsession with looking into the lives of ....well, frankly, people most of whom I have never had a face to face conversation with in the real world.  So, if you think I have unfollowed you, please do not be offended, I just cannot continue to look at pictures of unhealthy and disgusting foods.... that the main thrust of this as you have realized if you have read this far.... food.

In closing, I think that it sad that so many people worship food to the extent that they are polluting their bodies with all manner of manufactured crap.  No, I am not a vegetarian of any kind..... I cannot have anything containing gluten in my life if I want to live pain free,... if I want to live (period).  And I have chosen to remove most sugar from my diet, because I don't need all that sugar, and I feel so much better.




an aside: A lawyer once told me that, because I am the only child of my biological parents, and I have no husband or descendants, I am not related to anyone.  Now that certain of my 'relatives' have died, I am looking at embracing that.... 'not related to any one'.  My best "family" is a motley crew (no offense if you know you are one of US)..... that is of my own choosing.... and a select little group that does at least include me in the major holidays (Easter, Thanksgiving, Christmas) and a few birthdays...you know who you are, and I LOVE you guys.

Thank you. That is all.

A remembrance, a reminicense.....a wish....

It is at once foreign and somehow familiar... a place I believe I have been.....

.....a happier time.....A time at which I had realized I was actually happy........ 

I lived nearby it... could walk there; often did. 

The photo speaks to me very soul... a time of peace,... 

If only I had been aware......





I believe that it reminds me of Moraine Hills State Park (McHenry County Illinois) .....a happier time.....A time at which I had realized I was actually happy........ #ifIcouldturnbacktime

I lived on the east side of the park. If one were to walk to the west on my street, toward the main road... and then turn right and walk down to the next street.  There was an opening in the fence. 
A purposeful pathway, into the park. 



It was quiet there. 
Peaceful. 
and, I realize now, 
I was most at peace there. 

In a younger time.  

If only I had known.

Change your eating habits, a little bit at a time.....

This is excerpted from a conversation on a social media site:

Me: perhaps we should challenge each other.... 5 lbs? lose 5. I have had the self discipline to quit sugar. If I could do that, .... I should be able to do anything. Never mind..... I am coming to believe that my weight issue may be related to auto-immune..... Get healthier on some level, my friend, live longer.

Friend: yes. Going to work on losing, at least some of this weight.

Me: Regardless of the why of the extra weight...I believe that an actual lifestyle change is necessary and helpful.... Try to give up one thing,... some bad habit food item, and in its place substitute a vegetable (preferably), or a fruit.... and always keep in mind that everything has calories, so don't overdo any food. Moderation is key.

Me: I did not quit sugar over night. It took 4 weeks.

Friend: to be truthful it is the amount and the timing rather than what I eat. Overall my spouse and I eat pretty healthy by avoiding processed foods and bad carbs. Plus cooking in healthier ways.

Me: see! exactly: the amount. Learn to take one less spoonful. Don't try to back down all at once.... a little less to eat each week... slowly readjust the portion sizes.  Slowly.

Me: d I have had more sugar and carbs on two occasions recently, one week apart. (this is called carb cycling – in connection with a keto diet).  By the way, I don't like the way sugar tastes, now.

---------------------------------------
refer also to my blog post of 1/12/2018 "diet: the sum of food...."


What is important is making changes for the better.  I have quit sugar. Not entirely, but largely -- I do not add sugar to things.  I do use a keto diet recommended natural sweetener in some things. As I stated to my friend - I did not quit sugar "cold turkey", it was a process,... I did not plan it out.  First I quit drinking Pepsi -probably the single largest source of my sugar intake.  I was drinking 1 -12 ounce Pepsi a day Monday through Thursday only.  Now I drink iced tea that is 0 calories, 0 carbs, 0 sugar....and not that much caffeine.

This entire dietary change has been a long and slow process.  To begin with- at the beginning of 2017 I finally had the opportunity to make my life gluten free 100% when it comes to food.  I stopped eating in restaurants for the most part,...only dining out once a month.  I ate less food each day, measuring portions sizes to some extent, but not religiously.  I lost a few pounds over the course of several months.  It was the fact that I stuck to a pattern of eating less, and eating healthier foods that generated the minor weight loss.  The thing is that, after several months, I became involved in a project that takes up my time, but can also be stressful,... so the weight loss stalled. (I have been known to eat more when I am stressed, and this is from inactivity, not overload.) My weight has been consistent for a few months now.  (At least that is something....)

I have failed to achieve ketosis.  The problem lies in a lack of fats,.... I am eating too much protein and vegetable food.  I am examining the process.  Here is the IMPORTANT part:  I quit sugar! and I feel better than I have felt in a few years.  The fatigue that comes with auto-immune disorders has returned. (I have celiac disease, which is autoimmune.)  

Other pertinent facts:  I take vitamins,.... a multivitamin, B vitamins, B12, and currently calcium, magnesium, and 2,000 mg of Vitamin C, most of this daily, some every other day.  I also take a daily fiber supplement, acidophilus, allergy meds, and 1 clove of raw garlic- minced.

I sleep at least 6 hours most nights, and strive for a solid 8 hours --that is to say that I am reclined in bed for 8 full hours almost every night.  What can you do -you just wake up... 

At present I have come to believe that 2 things are true... 1 -which I have known all along, is that I need more exercise... (which is being worked on more due to a new job assignment, much farther from the parking lot, meaning that I now walk at least 2 miles a day.)...   and 2 -the weight is partially inflammation, and it is due to my autoimmune disorder.

Nonetheless, I am not going to give up.  I may not be achieving ketosis, but I am on the paleo diet side of a ketosis diet... I am consuming more "good" fats, more vegetables, and a better level of protein than can be achieved with "snack" bars.  When I feel like my stomach is empty I eat something,.... when I only think I want to eat I now stage an argument with myself in an effort to stop myself from eating by verbalizing, aloud, my objection to my own behaviour.

I found a very good ketosis cookbook, and I make my own "sweet" treats, mostly cocoa powder, peanut butter, and coconut oil.  And these "candies" can be easy to make, requiring a few ingredients and only a few minutes.  (my only real expense was purchasing a silicone "muffin" tray --easier to remove candy from. and not that costly, especially when you remember that I am no longer purchasing candy bars to eat.)

As an aside: look at everything you consume in a day/week/month.... How much sugar are you consuming?  Sugar, in every form, is a plague upon the population,... addiction to sugar is as bad as addiction to drugs.  Right now you are scoffing at my suggestion to examine your sugar intake.... you -YES YOU! are telling yourself that you don't consume that much sugar,... you are lying to yourself. I know, because I once was exactly like you!  You consume far more sugar that you realize (unless you are on certain diet disciplines (like Atkins, Paleo, or Ketosis).  Google this: "low carb or sugar free diets", and pick any article on that first page -skip any advertisements. 

What I am saying is this: 
..know yourself -think of any symptoms at all that your are experiencing
..examine your dietary habits
..read labels for sugar and/or carb content
..Read articles, look up information, and educate yourself
..drink more water -less soda pop, even diet soda
..TAKE BABY STEPS
..try to cut back on snacking (substitute another activity for putting food in your mouth)
..slowly adjust your portion sizes so that you eat a little bit less, but are not actually hungry....

There is NO "magic pill".....

MAKE LITTLE CHANGES -SLOWLY 

YOU GOTTA WANT TO.....and ..... YOU CAN DO IT.

be healthier my friends, live longer.....

Las Vegas a few years back

I visited Las Vegas in early October of 2000.  It was the second weekend of October, and the weather was perfect.  80F degree days, and 50F nights... for 4 days.  I was there as a tourist, not to gamble.  I did win $50 at a slot machine... quarters, right after someone else walked away from that slot machine.  Every time I had time the tables were busy, every time I was in a hurry to go someplace the tables were not busy.  That's okay, I did not have money to lose anyway.

I stayed at Luxor, in the pyramid.  That means you ride in an "inclinator" not an elevator.  That is an interesting sensation.  Anyway, Luxor, as in Ancient Egypt.  Quite by accident I was dressed to the theme.... I mean I could have passed for the stereotypical archaeologist... I wore a jacket with lots of pockets, jeans, and tan clogs that looked like they could be boots because of the cut of the jeans.  So, people in Luxor sometimes thought I was part of the show.... they have a guy wandering around in a Pharoah getup, and women dressed up like Cleopatra, like that.  I would hear people behind me in the elevator whispering about "she must be part of the show" and "we should follow her".... much to my amusement.

Anyway, if I ever go to Las Vegas again, I want to stay in a themed hotel and dress the part on purpose.  Just for giggles.  To be honest, I would probably stay at Luxor again, because I still have the jacket and it's the easiest getup to assemble. Looking to have a good time, and a lot of laughs..... I wish I could visit Las Vegas often.

my jacket had removable sleeves, and lots of pockets, like this

Paraphasia,... radio or telephone? (and strangers)

My mother once insisted that someone had called her on the radio. I knew what she was referring to, but I asked her questions about this "radio" device of which she spoke. I was trying to coax from her the word she was failing to produce.  She was actually talking about the telephone, but the word would not come to her, no matter how I questioned her. This was not harsh questioning at all, in fact we were chuckling throughout the conversation.... she was laughing because she knew that I understood what she meant to say, and I was laughing with her.

My mother had Alzheimer's Disease. I have written about this before, and will do so again.... Occasionally the Alzheimer's Disease brought forth what is called Verbal Paraphasia.  (Paraphasia definition and examples)  Radio for telephone. Shoe for foot. And once all she could come up with was "my other daughter", when she was actually thinking of her granddaughter -- and it took me a while to move on to the next generation as I tried to help her tell me what she was talking about.  She had me, of course, and a step-daughter she raised, and she referred to her third husband's adult daughters as "step-daughters" as well, so I rattled off 5 names, each of which elicited a "no" response. I stopped questioning her at that point and changed the subject for a few minutes, but she was distracted so I finally spoke the name of the granddaughter.  Then she replied with a hearty "yes". And when I said, "she is not your daughter, she is your granddaughter," my mother let loose an emphatic "Thank God!" and I had to laugh at that.  (Sorry, niece, if you are reading this, but that is what grandma said.)



My favorite story about her Alzheimer's induced confusion, I have to say would make my mother laugh out loud:
I arrived at the nursing home, early one Saturday, and the first thing my mother told me was that "a strange man was here". I immediately looked at the large wall calendar, which bore a notice asking visitors to please write their name on the date of their visit, so she would know who had been to see her. No male name, no name at all for the previous week. I was perplexed. A "strange" man. That is a little frightening coming from an old woman with Alzheimer's. My first question was, "did he touch you?" "NO! He didn't touch me, he was strange." I thought about that for a minute, and thinking of the words from a song asked, "funny-haha, or funny-strange?" Mother simply repeated, "strange". I searched my memory and suddenly realized who it must have been. My next question was, "Did he sing to you?" and she smiled a "yes. He was very silly." ... "Was it Pastor Bergen?" she said that she didn't know, but he did say The Lord's Prayer with her.  "That was Pastor Bergen." I told her, "he can be very silly." By the time Pastor had arrived at Mother's room he had visited with any number of other people, and he could get rather wound up in the frivolity of trying to spread a bit of cheer to people in a nursing home.  I can still imagine it: PB (as he called himself) swinging into the room singing a song, or simply singing a "hello" to my mother. She must have loved that! She would have been so delighted with cheerful singing that she would have forgotten exactly who the man was -even if he introduced himself to her.

I feel compelled to share these stories, partly because people need to know: Alzheimer's Disease or Dementia, is kind of a blanket diagnosis.  I mean it does different things to different people.  Sadly some seem to be trapped in a bad memory, and rant on and on about seemingly nonsensical things.  Some are simply silent, others angry.... and a few, like my mother, are docile and cooperative.  Most probably have crystal clear memories of events long past. And sometimes they can be extremely lucid. I was told that an aunt of mine who had Alzheimers would experience moments of lucidity during which she would state that she was frightened. That is so sad, and I am glad that she lived with her daughter, who would hug her and tell her not to worry.


I would bring the Reader's Digest with me on my weekly visits.  During the previous week I read the funny stories (Laughter: The best medicine, All in a Day's Work, Points to Ponder), a monthly wealth of laughter. Instinctively I knew what mother would laugh at and what she would pan.  With relish I would produce that Reader's Digest and prepare for her laughter. She would lean closer to listen.  Later, in an email to family members I would describe her condition and what we talked about... and the finish of the email would be titled: "Laughed Out Loud", followed by the funny story she liked the best.  It was what she laughed at that really revealed her condition, not anything else I could write.

Similar to paraphasia:

click here for more information /wiki/Malapropism

for funny examples-of-malapropism click here  (mother would have loved the Archie Bunker-isms, but she was no fan of Yogi Berra)