"triskaidekaphobia" is the fear of the number 13.
"paraskevidekatriaphobia" is the fear of Friday the 13th.
LINK to wikipedia for Friday_the_13th
It's ridiculous.... that said: I have a personal policy. I NEVER stay home on Friday the 13th. Not since some time in the early 1980's anyway. Before that if it was a Friday I was probably in school anyway.....
I really don't remember the exact year, or month.... but once upon a time, in the early 1980's (yeah, I'm that old, what's it to ya!) I stayed home on a Friday the 13th. I may even have asked for the day off from work on purpose,... I really don't remember.
What I do remember about it, is that things went wrong.... a sink backed up, things were broken.,..... needed items were not taken with when we left the house..... it was, all in all, a very long, very bad day.
That is when I instituted my policy to always make sure to be at work on Friday the 13th. And in all these years my Friday the 13ths have been fairly uneventful. It's a fact. This year I am a little nervous, because I am not currently employed,... nonetheless, I left the house before 6:00am (it was still dark!),... and I have no intention of going home earlier that 2 or 3 in the afternoon.
One year I sent a fun email, with funny facts about Friday the 13th.... I sent it probably on Wednseday the 11th.... anyway, my much older half-brother decided that he needed to try to rain on my parade. He replied to my funny Friday the 13th email by crabbing at me about being superstitious....
I let him have it! I was blunt, I told him (in an emailed reply) to not be such a "hard-ass" and see the humor in things.
Anyway, I guess some folks think my policy of always working on Friday the 13th is superstitious all the same. and you know what? I don't care!!!! I just know what works for me.
I laugh at black cats, and have no issues with ladders, or broken mirrors..... just, please, leave your open umbrella outside, and for heaven's sake don't spill any salt!!
Friday, October 13, 2017
Monday, October 9, 2017
the last child
I am the last child.
A post script.
Unexpected,
but not accident,
actually SURPRISE!
Daddy was thrilled.
Mother less so.
She was older, perhaps wiser,...
it was not an easy time.
I am the youngest child,
and the only child,
simultaneously.
He had 3,
She had 1,
their combined 4 were adults,
by the time I came along.
It was strange,
having older parents.
All of their friends were grandparents,
or nearly so.
I prefer the company of my elders.
I would, frankly, rather talk to your parents...
unless you are older than I.
I was simultaneously an only child and the youngest.
A post script.
Unexpected,
but not accident,
actually SURPRISE!
Daddy was thrilled.
Mother less so.
She was older, perhaps wiser,...
it was not an easy time.
I am the youngest child,
and the only child,
simultaneously.
He had 3,
She had 1,
their combined 4 were adults,
by the time I came along.
It was strange,
having older parents.
All of their friends were grandparents,
or nearly so.
I prefer the company of my elders.
I would, frankly, rather talk to your parents...
unless you are older than I.
I was simultaneously an only child and the youngest.
Kitchen Remodel
A friend shared a funny video on facebook this morning,....
never buy a bird larger than you can handle
and that reminded me of a story my mother told me...about how she got a brand new kitchen.
The house we lived in had a very large kitchen/dining combination room. We simply called it 'the kitchen'. I don't know exactly, but I think that room was at least 25' x 16'.... it was very large, the house was custom built in the 1920's. I was all part of one large building which comprised the house, large garage, boiler, workshop, and attached to the back were the greenhouses,...large glass warehouse-style buildings in which my father raised hybrid carnations... but that is another story.
The house was built for my father and his first wife (who, sadly, died young). I have no idea who actually planned that kitchen, who wanted it to be that large,... but it seems like a good idea for a young family, probably thinking they would have a large family, as my father came from a family of ten.
The setup, as you entered the house from the garage, was that you entered directly in to the dining room end of the kitchen. It was a large, open space, and at the far end of the room from the entry door was the actual kitchen. There was a window above the kitchen sink, which allowed the person using that sink to look out to the west, across the driveway, yard, and out to the road. There was also a window in the dining area that faced the same view.
The kitchen, as I knew it, was comprised of some lovely, handbuilt wooden cabinets as the counter and storage above the counters. The sink on the west wall, and the stove/oven on the south wall, making an "L" shaped kitchen work area. Uninterrupted counter space, with the stove/oven wedged in between counter areas. I believe that the trash can was at the end of the counter between kitchen area and dining area (but I could be wrong about that). Along the east wall of the room, from the entry door in, were first a bathroom, then a bedroom, and somewhere -perhaps between those 2 rooms was a sideboard. This made the east side of the kitchen something of a hallway.
At some point, well before I was ever thought of, there was an incident that resulted in the kitchen layout I have described:
My parents were entertaining guests,.. I believe it may actually have been Thanksgiving, because a turkey was involved and they only had turkey for Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year's Day. The guests were in the living room,... a room equally as large as the kitchen, with more of a family room immediately beyond the south kitchen wall, and a formal sitting room area beyond -up to the south wall of the home.
My mother was in the kitchen preparing the turkey. Here I will admit, that I don't remember every detail of the story, but the turkey must have been coming out of the oven.... My father came to help her move the turkey from the oven to the countertop. Here is the crucial part,..... at that time, before the remodel, the trash can was in a space that existed between the stove/oven and the countertop. (I will surmise that it was not the same stove as when the house was built,... perhaps old gas stoves were much larger than whatever they had at this time.)
By now, if you could follow all of my blather, you may have guessed where this is going.... the part they laughed about later.....
The two of them, carefully moving the turkey from stovetop to counter,...lost control of the bird... and it fell,.....
.
.
.
into the trash can!!
.
.
.
which had a fresh paper sack in it. Whew!! That was a close one!! At least the trash was empty, with a new bag. However, my parents were HORRIFIED, and said nothing to their guests, just proceeded with the meal. (wow! that sounds a lot like the plot of a 1960's sitcom.....*loud thud, "is everything all right in there?"...."yes, sure, everything is, um, ....fine")
The following week they began to plan the new kitchen.....
getting ready for holiday dinner
(Thank you, Michelle, for sharing the "bird too big" video on FB.)
never buy a bird larger than you can handle
and that reminded me of a story my mother told me...about how she got a brand new kitchen.
The house we lived in had a very large kitchen/dining combination room. We simply called it 'the kitchen'. I don't know exactly, but I think that room was at least 25' x 16'.... it was very large, the house was custom built in the 1920's. I was all part of one large building which comprised the house, large garage, boiler, workshop, and attached to the back were the greenhouses,...large glass warehouse-style buildings in which my father raised hybrid carnations... but that is another story.
The house was built for my father and his first wife (who, sadly, died young). I have no idea who actually planned that kitchen, who wanted it to be that large,... but it seems like a good idea for a young family, probably thinking they would have a large family, as my father came from a family of ten.
The setup, as you entered the house from the garage, was that you entered directly in to the dining room end of the kitchen. It was a large, open space, and at the far end of the room from the entry door was the actual kitchen. There was a window above the kitchen sink, which allowed the person using that sink to look out to the west, across the driveway, yard, and out to the road. There was also a window in the dining area that faced the same view.
The kitchen, as I knew it, was comprised of some lovely, handbuilt wooden cabinets as the counter and storage above the counters. The sink on the west wall, and the stove/oven on the south wall, making an "L" shaped kitchen work area. Uninterrupted counter space, with the stove/oven wedged in between counter areas. I believe that the trash can was at the end of the counter between kitchen area and dining area (but I could be wrong about that). Along the east wall of the room, from the entry door in, were first a bathroom, then a bedroom, and somewhere -perhaps between those 2 rooms was a sideboard. This made the east side of the kitchen something of a hallway.
At some point, well before I was ever thought of, there was an incident that resulted in the kitchen layout I have described:
My parents were entertaining guests,.. I believe it may actually have been Thanksgiving, because a turkey was involved and they only had turkey for Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year's Day. The guests were in the living room,... a room equally as large as the kitchen, with more of a family room immediately beyond the south kitchen wall, and a formal sitting room area beyond -up to the south wall of the home.
My mother was in the kitchen preparing the turkey. Here I will admit, that I don't remember every detail of the story, but the turkey must have been coming out of the oven.... My father came to help her move the turkey from the oven to the countertop. Here is the crucial part,..... at that time, before the remodel, the trash can was in a space that existed between the stove/oven and the countertop. (I will surmise that it was not the same stove as when the house was built,... perhaps old gas stoves were much larger than whatever they had at this time.)
By now, if you could follow all of my blather, you may have guessed where this is going.... the part they laughed about later.....
The two of them, carefully moving the turkey from stovetop to counter,...lost control of the bird... and it fell,.....
.
.
.
into the trash can!!
.
.
.
which had a fresh paper sack in it. Whew!! That was a close one!! At least the trash was empty, with a new bag. However, my parents were HORRIFIED, and said nothing to their guests, just proceeded with the meal. (wow! that sounds a lot like the plot of a 1960's sitcom.....*loud thud, "is everything all right in there?"...."yes, sure, everything is, um, ....fine")
The following week they began to plan the new kitchen.....
getting ready for holiday dinner
(Thank you, Michelle, for sharing the "bird too big" video on FB.)
Sunday, October 8, 2017
Thai food and neckties and inquiring minds....
I get many of my writing prompts from items I read on social media,... this is one of them...
I was perusing Facebook, just a few minutes ago, and I came across this article from The Onion (1)
Area Mother Doesn’t See Why Thai People Need To Make Food So Spicy
Someone had commented that their mom pronounced Thai "thigh".... and that sparked a memory.....
A former coworker of mine asked me one day, "Have you ever tried thigh food?"
I chuckled and said to him, "Mark, it's pronounced tie."
I laughed as he turned to me, incredulous, and asked, "How did you learn that?"
--now here I will mention that Mark is older than I am by a handful of years, and it truly surprised me that he, in fact did not know this.
So, I told him this story:
"when I was about 7 years old,... during the Vietnam War (Southeast Asia: Vietnam, Laos, Cambodia, and Thailand).... I kept hearing "Thailand" on the tv and radio. Now, I spent chunks of time alone in the back seat of the car (we went "bumming" a lot, visiting friends and relatives)..... and I pondered many things while riding in the car. So, on a particular day I was pondering Thailand, and neck ties,... in my child's mind trying to see how those 2 things could be connected. I knew that Thailand was a far away land,... and neckties are pretty, and we knew a man who had traveled the world -who had pretty, hand-painted neckties from some far-away land (Japan actually). So, I tried putting 2 and 2 together....
"Mom, can I ask you a question?"
"Okay, what do you want to ask me?"
This came totally out of left field as far as my Mom was concerned, "Is Thailand where they make neckties?" --it made perfect sense to my childish mind after all.
"Oh!" I wish I could have seen her face.... and I will always wonder if my Dad was listening to my question at all.
My Mother was big on learning and reading, and she had a fairly decent library at home,... so, of course, we learned somethings. I do not recall exactly what was said,.... but I recall that in her answer she was amused by my idea. "No, neckties do not come from Thailand".
I can recall sitting in the back seat, a little disappointed that neckties did not grow on trees in Thailand, nor are there huge warehouses full of Asian women (which is really what my innocent mind pictured) with sewing machines, carefully sewing neckties in mass production for men all over the world.
Even though I do not have a recollection of what transpired after my question, I know that we looked in some books. (2) I know that an Atlas of the World was laid out on a table in our home. We looked at Southeast Asia,... perhaps we even perused an older World Atlas and found that Thailand was previously known as Siam (3).
Anyway, at 7, I was fast approaching the age where I paid attention and heard everything, and began to understand things. That the world is not just families, happily living near each other, and spending long amounts of time with each other. The world is not comprised of families who "go bumming", which was my father's particular lingo for "let's go visit someone, I have not yet decided which direction we will go".
I had started to become aware of a world outside of my little bubble of existence.... and that will be another blog post for another day.....
References:
(1)The Onion is an American digital media company and news satire organization that publishes articles on international, national, and local news
(2) Regarding books in our home I refer you to a previous blog entry:
Books Are In My Soul (March 13, 2017)
(3) Siam officially renamed Thailand
I was perusing Facebook, just a few minutes ago, and I came across this article from The Onion (1)
Area Mother Doesn’t See Why Thai People Need To Make Food So Spicy
Someone had commented that their mom pronounced Thai "thigh".... and that sparked a memory.....
A former coworker of mine asked me one day, "Have you ever tried thigh food?"
I chuckled and said to him, "Mark, it's pronounced tie."
I laughed as he turned to me, incredulous, and asked, "How did you learn that?"
--now here I will mention that Mark is older than I am by a handful of years, and it truly surprised me that he, in fact did not know this.
So, I told him this story:
"when I was about 7 years old,... during the Vietnam War (Southeast Asia: Vietnam, Laos, Cambodia, and Thailand).... I kept hearing "Thailand" on the tv and radio. Now, I spent chunks of time alone in the back seat of the car (we went "bumming" a lot, visiting friends and relatives)..... and I pondered many things while riding in the car. So, on a particular day I was pondering Thailand, and neck ties,... in my child's mind trying to see how those 2 things could be connected. I knew that Thailand was a far away land,... and neckties are pretty, and we knew a man who had traveled the world -who had pretty, hand-painted neckties from some far-away land (Japan actually). So, I tried putting 2 and 2 together....
"Mom, can I ask you a question?"
"Okay, what do you want to ask me?"
This came totally out of left field as far as my Mom was concerned, "Is Thailand where they make neckties?" --it made perfect sense to my childish mind after all.
"Oh!" I wish I could have seen her face.... and I will always wonder if my Dad was listening to my question at all.
My Mother was big on learning and reading, and she had a fairly decent library at home,... so, of course, we learned somethings. I do not recall exactly what was said,.... but I recall that in her answer she was amused by my idea. "No, neckties do not come from Thailand".
 |
| a reasonable representation of the patterns of neckties my father owned |
I can recall sitting in the back seat, a little disappointed that neckties did not grow on trees in Thailand, nor are there huge warehouses full of Asian women (which is really what my innocent mind pictured) with sewing machines, carefully sewing neckties in mass production for men all over the world.
Even though I do not have a recollection of what transpired after my question, I know that we looked in some books. (2) I know that an Atlas of the World was laid out on a table in our home. We looked at Southeast Asia,... perhaps we even perused an older World Atlas and found that Thailand was previously known as Siam (3).
Anyway, at 7, I was fast approaching the age where I paid attention and heard everything, and began to understand things. That the world is not just families, happily living near each other, and spending long amounts of time with each other. The world is not comprised of families who "go bumming", which was my father's particular lingo for "let's go visit someone, I have not yet decided which direction we will go".
I had started to become aware of a world outside of my little bubble of existence.... and that will be another blog post for another day.....
 |
| Thai restaurants were new to the area when Mark asked me whether I had ever had "thigh" food. |
References:
(1)The Onion is an American digital media company and news satire organization that publishes articles on international, national, and local news
(2) Regarding books in our home I refer you to a previous blog entry:
Books Are In My Soul (March 13, 2017)
(3) Siam officially renamed Thailand
Friday, October 6, 2017
Do not mourn, rejoice, for the believer is reborn...
Loss.
Loss is hard.
Loss of a parent can be crushing.
Loss of a person who cared for you, with tenderness, leaving you with the fondest of memories etched into your soul,... that is almost a burden. It should not be.
What is sometimes hard for people is just to focus on the best of times.
Remember the love and the laughter.
Remember the tender moments when they touched you deeply.
If you were old enough to have such memories, consider the good fortune of that. If, when the beloved person passed, you truly understood what it meant, then you are lucky.
My mother could be described as a "life partner" of mine. My father died when I was kid, so for a time it was just her and I. We lived in the same house until I was a young adult, in my twenties. We lived apart for three or four years, and when my "step"father died, my mom came to live at my house. We were together again, partners in crime, for more than a decade. Two adults, we became friends, above being mother and daughter; friends who shared so many things. And yet, when she died I was not sad for more than a few hours. Allow me to explain:
You see, my mother was not afraid of death. She was a believer. Her faith was strong. When she died she would go to The Lord. She loved her God, and knew that He loved her, as He loves all of his children.
When I saw her, still in her bed, in the nursing home.... she looked serene. There was a hint of a smile at her lips. How could I be sad? I knew that it was like I told her: when God's angels came for her she went with them. I had to rejoice for her! She was happy to be with God, in His heaven.
It felt odd, in a way, to be joyous in that time. But I had signs from her,... I saw the monarch butterflies, in gardens, and I knew that she was happy in a glorious place. I was so grateful for her strong faith, and for her release from the terrible illness that she suffered. (Alzheimer's Disease)
All these years, since her death, I have told only a handful of people that I was euphoric for months afterward. I have come to believe that she was with me that entire time, making sure that I found the strength to carry on.... and to never forget her belief, her faith...., and that I had the good memories to carry me through.... and to always honor her wish that there be no mourning...thus the photo, near the top of this blog,..when I see that I feel her presence... she did not write it, but they are her words, her thoughts.....
Loss is hard.
Loss of a parent can be crushing.
Loss of a person who cared for you, with tenderness, leaving you with the fondest of memories etched into your soul,... that is almost a burden. It should not be.
What is sometimes hard for people is just to focus on the best of times.
Remember the love and the laughter.
Remember the tender moments when they touched you deeply.
If you were old enough to have such memories, consider the good fortune of that. If, when the beloved person passed, you truly understood what it meant, then you are lucky.
My mother could be described as a "life partner" of mine. My father died when I was kid, so for a time it was just her and I. We lived in the same house until I was a young adult, in my twenties. We lived apart for three or four years, and when my "step"father died, my mom came to live at my house. We were together again, partners in crime, for more than a decade. Two adults, we became friends, above being mother and daughter; friends who shared so many things. And yet, when she died I was not sad for more than a few hours. Allow me to explain:
You see, my mother was not afraid of death. She was a believer. Her faith was strong. When she died she would go to The Lord. She loved her God, and knew that He loved her, as He loves all of his children.
When I saw her, still in her bed, in the nursing home.... she looked serene. There was a hint of a smile at her lips. How could I be sad? I knew that it was like I told her: when God's angels came for her she went with them. I had to rejoice for her! She was happy to be with God, in His heaven.
It felt odd, in a way, to be joyous in that time. But I had signs from her,... I saw the monarch butterflies, in gardens, and I knew that she was happy in a glorious place. I was so grateful for her strong faith, and for her release from the terrible illness that she suffered. (Alzheimer's Disease)
All these years, since her death, I have told only a handful of people that I was euphoric for months afterward. I have come to believe that she was with me that entire time, making sure that I found the strength to carry on.... and to never forget her belief, her faith...., and that I had the good memories to carry me through.... and to always honor her wish that there be no mourning...thus the photo, near the top of this blog,..when I see that I feel her presence... she did not write it, but they are her words, her thoughts.....
Thursday, October 5, 2017
in autumn
My heart sings in autumn.
A time of endings… closure…
Bright colors. Cool temperatures.
Warm sunlight, comfy sweatshirt
and blue jeans.
In autumn my heart sings.and blue jeans.
My heart sings in autumn
Color and sunshine
In autumn my heart singsTuesday, October 3, 2017
Given Names and gender and stereotypes
What's in a name.....
Recently a friend of mine got all hung up on the name of a dog.... In her mind Casey is a male name. I guess she did not follow the Facebook posts of the woman the dog belonged to.... I knew that Casey was female. I never really thought about the dog's name.... when I was a kid I had a girl doll, a friend of Barbie, whose name was Casey. And I mean that the doll was packaged and sold as "Casey". (Casey was my favorite Barbie doll.) I have a female relative named Kasey.
I have a female relative named Terri. The first time my parents met a boy named Terry they were taken aback. In my parents era people more often chose given names out of The Bible for their children, or reused the given name of a relative. I myself have posed the question more than once or twice: "what ever happened to Mary and Jane and Carol?" To my dad, if he did not know a child's name, all boys were Butch and all girls were Susie, and that was forgotten after they introduced themselves.
baby names that work equally for girl or for boy -- there are names missing from the list on the website.... what about Stacey/Stacy,... I went to school with a girl named Stacey,..so I thought that was only a girl name until I heard of actor Stacy Keach......
I have a friend named Dale, a woman,.... wasn't Dale another one of Barbie's friends? Dale Evans was the wife of Roy Rogers.
People, especially the older generations, get hung up on given names. And rightly so, because now days you really don't know by the given name if you are going to find a female or a male. I mean Brooklyn (you're thinking 'girl' right?) , and if you've even been to Brooklyn -why? The same for Dakota (thinking 'boy'? guess again), which I think would be a great name for an Alaskan Husky or a Malamute, and have you been to the Dakotas?
Ranker.com will give you a list of famous people with whatever name you are curious about.
When I was young there was a Neil Diamond song I really liked,..it was Desiree.... great song..... but I commented to my mother that "if I have a daughter I'm going to name her Desiree." To which my mother replied, "No you won't." ....and Mom was right, because a year later my favorite names were Sarah and Michael, and I would not have dreamed of using Desiree for anything other than a middle name.
The point, though, is that in this day and age we must let go of every type of stereotyping and antiquated thought when it comes to names. Actually naming stereotypes should never have existed t to begin with, because there are millions of people on the planet, and everyone has their own ideas of what names should be given to girls or boys or human beings.
Personally, I would like to see a return to names from the early 1900s.... Emma, Helen, Lillian, Augustus, Charles, Frederick. What, I ask you, is wrong with those perfectly lovely names?
This is Casey, the mellow old girl:
Recently a friend of mine got all hung up on the name of a dog.... In her mind Casey is a male name. I guess she did not follow the Facebook posts of the woman the dog belonged to.... I knew that Casey was female. I never really thought about the dog's name.... when I was a kid I had a girl doll, a friend of Barbie, whose name was Casey. And I mean that the doll was packaged and sold as "Casey". (Casey was my favorite Barbie doll.) I have a female relative named Kasey.
I have a female relative named Terri. The first time my parents met a boy named Terry they were taken aback. In my parents era people more often chose given names out of The Bible for their children, or reused the given name of a relative. I myself have posed the question more than once or twice: "what ever happened to Mary and Jane and Carol?" To my dad, if he did not know a child's name, all boys were Butch and all girls were Susie, and that was forgotten after they introduced themselves.
baby names that work equally for girl or for boy -- there are names missing from the list on the website.... what about Stacey/Stacy,... I went to school with a girl named Stacey,..so I thought that was only a girl name until I heard of actor Stacy Keach......
I have a friend named Dale, a woman,.... wasn't Dale another one of Barbie's friends? Dale Evans was the wife of Roy Rogers.
People, especially the older generations, get hung up on given names. And rightly so, because now days you really don't know by the given name if you are going to find a female or a male. I mean Brooklyn (you're thinking 'girl' right?) , and if you've even been to Brooklyn -why? The same for Dakota (thinking 'boy'? guess again), which I think would be a great name for an Alaskan Husky or a Malamute, and have you been to the Dakotas?
 |
| DAKOTA Fanning and BROOKLYN Beckham |
Ranker.com will give you a list of famous people with whatever name you are curious about.
When I was young there was a Neil Diamond song I really liked,..it was Desiree.... great song..... but I commented to my mother that "if I have a daughter I'm going to name her Desiree." To which my mother replied, "No you won't." ....and Mom was right, because a year later my favorite names were Sarah and Michael, and I would not have dreamed of using Desiree for anything other than a middle name.
The point, though, is that in this day and age we must let go of every type of stereotyping and antiquated thought when it comes to names. Actually naming stereotypes should never have existed t to begin with, because there are millions of people on the planet, and everyone has their own ideas of what names should be given to girls or boys or human beings.
Personally, I would like to see a return to names from the early 1900s.... Emma, Helen, Lillian, Augustus, Charles, Frederick. What, I ask you, is wrong with those perfectly lovely names?
This is Casey, the mellow old girl:
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